I AM ANOTHER

I AM ANOTHER

1 Year. 12 Months. 52 Weeks. 365 days. 8760 hours.525 600 minutes 31 536 000 seconds.
Time?
Who decides it? Who measures its accuracy?
Time of Birth. Time of Death.
Funny how we cry at funerals, but we all were smiling at someone’s birth.
Did you realise you were joyous at their sentencing?
The ticker to your imminent demise begins.
Tick Tock, Tick Tock…Life’s irony, Death’s clock.
YOLO.  You Only Live Once. That is true, but if you love another, that’s two. Then three, and maybe four, and then more. That is the definition of immortal.
Not living forever as one, for our death is the only guarantee in this life, but living through the eyes of another.
I AM ANOTHER.
Thoughts imparted, affection displayed.
Expressed in different ways, from one being to another.
Energy cannot be created or destroyed, but it can be transferred.
Are we not followers of this same principle? Is it not safe to say WE ARE ENERGY?
But what do we do with ourselves?
Time and energy, one is constant and cannot be altered or changed, the other can.
But we get it wrong.
We think Time is on our side, procrastination is our song.
Time is not your friend, brother or mother, TIME IS YOUR JUDGE.
Watching your every action, right and wrong, slander and initiative.
And in a blink of an eye…
It’s OVER.
We know our fate, but ignorance is bliss right?
We are Energy, we are not Time.
We can manage our energy. Each person we meet exchanges energy with us, and we either give more or receive more. Manage your energy flow.
We are all wasting time in one way or another, but are we willing to waste our energy too?? FUCK THAT!!
The life you have wasn’t your choice, the life you lead is.
Jesus said we all have a measure of faith. Lord forgive me for using this, faith can be equated to energy.
You have no excuse for not getting that car you want. You don’t have it because you are LAZY.
You don’t have that nice job? SO? Grab a book, go learn more.
Time is your judge. Energy is your ADVOCATE.
If you don’t use your advocate, you will lose your case, and trust me that’s a life sentence to say the least because really we know it’s simply on death roll.
Miss me with the motivation, anecdotes and cute quotes, I should be doing better and that’s my heart song.
So think about it, how’s YOUR trial doing?

Advertisements

Wrist Tabernacles

Back to reality, imaginative fallacy…

I wake up, heavy breathing

Eyes teary, heart’s beating…

Another nightmare of the norm

Haunted in my dreams by the man with the horns

So to my tabernacle I pray…

Sacrifice a little blood…

Oh the rush…washing my sins away

Time to start the day

Smile on my face

Dismay in soul

Prayer lines faded the minute I walk out the door

Jeers and cheers, Chirping and twerking

School still the same

Dream sellers and urchins

Running from it all

Haggard from the stereotypes

Searching for my own path

Self-Preservation

But at a cost can I get lost in my thoughts

Doubt’s resilience, Self-Esteem’s impotence

Feeling of nothingness, failure’s eminence

Clouded by judgement, Taunted by fear

I can’t take it anymore

I’m about to break down

I feel it, my tears are near

To the tabernacle

My vision needs to clear

One line, two lines

Prayer is full of despair

But a sense of peace shadows me in here.

I’m safe in my haven

The cave I engrave in

My stowaway fortress

Shielding me from the torment

That is life.

If only life came with a remote

Pause it when it hurts

Rewind and blind the mind

Record a new accord

Forward the greasily thoughts

And play the perfect parts.

Be my own Picasso

Creating my life’s art.

Last stream of tears rubbing my cheeks

Pick myself up cause’ I know life can be a b…..

Rolling down my sleeves cause the battle has been lost

Waiting for the next time my wrists will pay the cost.

 

 

 

A Million Miles Away

Its a million miles away

I don’t know what to say

I’ve lived up 2 your expectations

And yet they always seem to get elevated

Why do I keep trying

I’m lying to myself that its satisfying

I’m pacing,my heart’s racing

I’m in pain looking at what I’ve dragged myself in

Is it mud,filth or plain pain?

Either way,nothing I wanna stay in

I’m still a million miles away

Relentless anguish,painful memories

What can I do to relieve the tension

Maybe cut myself to see how much I bleed

And then like adrenaline,the pain will rush out of me

I’m depressed,yet I press,

I press on like a falling soldier,why?

Its my duty to do so

But what happens when duty affects destiny

Should I sit and wait?

Should I refuse my orderly fate?

Its life right…I’m doing the right thing right?

Or am I simply conforming to ensure normality

I’m twisted I know,but what if twisted makes me happy?

Should I play and stay in a fantasy that is admired?

Or should I live and decide in a life that inspires

Settling isn’t wrong,if u don’t realise it.

But it’s wrong if you realise you are not where you are meant to be

A million miles away I still stay

Questions still make me wonder if its ok

The walk is far,its undecided,but something definitely defined

I’m not where I’m meant to be

I’m still a million miles away

Am I in the wrong place? Yes…but is it worth moving?

Happiness is not acquired but lived…

We cannot pursue happiness,unless we see it as life

Can one pursue life?yes 

Have u pursued yours?

Are you pursuing it?

Life is not what you live

But what you’ve experienced.

And now I realise,I’m not living a life

For I have not began pursuing it.

The End Of A Tortured Soul

Chains shackling me down in desperation

Exerts of pain pinning my existence to a futile being

I’m hurting, but what’s the difference between pain and pleasure?

Is it not just a thin line that separates them?

Am I playing on the border?

Walking like a wounded soldier, I drift into a fantasy

Seeing nothing but bliss…ah ecstasy…why do u beseech me?

You call my name and put me into a deep trance

Where hopes and dreams are but a whisper away

I long for it, almost immense my thoughts into it

Why can I not just drift into this abyss of a day dream?

I want to fly with the clouds

But yet I’m drowning

Deep down in the sea of my agony

But even at the bottom of the sea

 There is coral, a beautiful sight

The creatures of the deep all move in one accord

Some sort of tranquility I might add

So why should I complain that I am tortured?

When I can find beauty in even the deepest of pains

It’s the oddest of feelings but I begin to enjoy the pain

The passion, pleasure and pain are in sync

A glimmer of a light in my darkness

Or is this just another illusion I have found myself in again?

Am I drowning or simply learning to breathe in the deep?

Yet again another Ying to my Yang…we need each other to distinguish reality from fantasy.

Math Love Trilogy: The Introduction

Mathematics…What do you remember about Mathematics? The Nerds getting A’s, the teacher screaming about homework, the never ending story questions? Either way Mathematics always seemed to just be clear cut and straight to the point, nothing really unique about it, unless you are a Mathematician or Physicist then Math becomes your Christian Grey, whips and chains sex freak. But I’m talking to us, the simpletons, the people who were merely introduced to a subject that made us get closer to our tertiary dreams. Yeah I said it, you know if you did badly in Math things would be bleak for you. Dad always told me to take Math seriously, well what can I say, he wanted me to be an engineer so I don’t blame him. Now let’s talk about love…girls just smiled at the thought, I see you. What is love? And no I’m not asking for a holy answer because I am a Christian and yes God is love, but that’s a whole new topic on its own…go read my other poem “A Simple Love story” that’s barely the surface of that topic. I’m talking about the love you have experienced. The knotty gritty escapades that you have gone through because of love and for love. I see heads nodding, that’s what I like because you know what I’m talking about, and a couple of feelings have just been caught. Memories just flooded in of what is…was…could have been and what never will be. Its love, it’s a dirty game with rules we haven’t quite understood yet, but we play it anyway. Now back to those feelings…take a minute to just think of that LOVE time you had…I know I could be digging up skeletons from the grave for some of you but it is necessary for what I’m about to unravel. I started this off with Math, and I brought in love. What’s the significance you ask? Tangential, Parallel and Asymptotic. Yeah you wishing you paid attention and remembered the meaning to those words. No problem, grab a pen, you will know their meanings by the end. They each tell a significant story really, and will begin with story number 1: Love at First Sight, Yet Gone by Second.

Strawberry Dipped Lies

Tell me something sweet

Tell me something nice

Even though deep inside

I know that it’s a lie

Fed by your sweet words

They make me feel alive

A sense of belonging

Got my mind on cloud 9

A slave to the praise

A description that I never see

Blinded by my pride

I know I’m swimming in a sea

Sea of despair, guided by my fear

The fear of being nothing again

I never wanna go there

But why do I do this?

Why am I so scared?

I know I can do better

I know who I am capable of being

Yet I love the lies,

They take away my cries

I’m safe in their bosom

But its still theirs and not mine

So I still am alone,

Like a piano in one key, monotone.

Where is my song?

When will I sing?

Questions I don’t want answers to

Caus’ then I know I have to do it on my own

So I’ll remain where I am

Because lies taste sweeter than truth

Look at your life…tell me there isn’t any proof?

Window Pain

Like Apple has no Windows, neither does my life.

Concluded to be hidden from the world’s gaze,

I look up to the sky and wonder.

Wonder why we constantly seek out approval, yet hearts deniable to the eyes.

The faults covered by smiles and laughter… oh God why? 

Sitting in the corner, bounded by praises yet never understood phrases.

Whether said in truth, or just temporary truths, and yet i sit and listen.

Fascinated by the aura of their words but it means nothing to me.

Because if they knew they real me they would definitely flee.

The pain, the lies, the cries, I’m not the man they see me to be.

I’m wretched, I’m broken, I’m battered, I have scares and bruises,

These all attained from experience’s hurtful cruises.

And yet here I am, still seated, smiling and undefeated.

I carry on gazing in the distance, questioning my existence. 

Why, why did you look at me that way?

Gave me a chance yet you know none of my secrets,

Of how I cry at night, of how my smiles turn to frowns behind closed doors.

I’m a pretender, some kind of life offender, and yet you sought me out,

You gave me a reason to make a window.

There is pain, but as well as that there is a window pane, meaning im not afraid.

Afraid, to show the pain, you looked at my soul, and took the boulder away.

What can i say?

The smiles and laughs aint all fake

Cause around you… I have a reason to say, my day was made.

From hard rock to clay…there is hope for change.

Heart exposed, I don’t have to hide anymore.

Opened up and showing it all.

1st you made a window so that you could see my soul ,

*deep sigh* i can’t wait till you get to open the door.